Kaitlin's Big Orange Pants

This is a picture of Kaitlin in her two favorite articles of clothing--her jammies and her big orange pants. She just recently figured out that she can wear the two together. What a fashion statement it makes. I thought I drew the line at buying character shoes, but now that we have a pair of Dora sandals and a pair of Dora tennis shoes for hiking (and, who am I fooling, everything else!), I've drawn the line at wearing the big orange pants in public. While they're cute in an REI baby sort of way, they're just way too big for her. They're baggy even over her bulky blanket sleepers! They must be mislabeled. They say they're for 18 months, but I swear they'd fit a 5 year old. Of course if she really put up a stink, I'd probably cave. . . .I'm such a pushover when it comes to that cheesy smile!

Went to the doctor yesterday.

I don't know about you, but I hate going to the doctor--except when I'm pregnant. For me doctors are a last resort. I only go if I think I have something infectuous that I can get medication for, and thus not pass it on to Kaitlin and Jeremy. Of course I'm a little less strict with this rule for Kaitlin since she can't tell me what's going on with her yet, but as she gets older, we'll probably see the doctor less and less. Which brings me to my prenatal visits, and we can probably lump Kaitlin's Well Child checkups in there, too. I love my ObGyn, Dr. Judd. He's probaby not for everyone. He's not overly gentle, like a pedatrician is. He's very straightforward and to the point. And for someone who has an aversion to doctors this is a very good thing! Our personalities mesh really well. He has the funniest analogies to compare pregnancy experiences with everyday experiences. He's been around forever--he was my Mom's ObGyn when I was born--but I don't feel like he, himself, is ancient. I've heard through the grapvine that he was the youngest graduate from Stanford's medical school, though I don't know how much younger we was than everyone else. And he's the forceps expert in Utah county. Since Kaitlin had to have a little help with the forceps this was tremendously comforting to me.

I also love going to the doctore when I'm pregnant because it marks the passage of time. Isn't that what we all want when we're pregnant, for time to pass quickly? I love it when it seems like my previous appointment was just last week. It means time is passing quickly. This is why I can lump Kaitlin's regular checkups with my doctor's appointments. They mark the passage of time. Our pediatrician gives these cool little pamphlets about child development that I love to read. This week marks the 28th week of my pregnancy. Only 12 weeks to go. I can hardly wait. Soon my appointments will get more and more frequent, which means that the baby is getting closer and closer. I can't wait to not be pregnant anymore! At this point I am way more excited about not being pregnant than I am about having a baby. But don't worry, the scales are tipping. Who could help but be excited when the light at the end of the tunnel produces something as precious as this?

Anyway, have I mentioned that we're thinking of naming the baby Alexander? I am really struggling with the name, but Jeremy loves this, and I like it more than Zachary, which he loved before we came up with Alexander. For some reason I don't see "Zachary" as a man. Silly, I know, but who knows why we feel the way we do about certain names? If we go with Alexander we'll call him Xander because Alex Hanks sounds too hard. What do you think? Are there any boys names that you think we should consider?

Another Cafe Press find, or, how blogging is going diminsh my resolve to save, make me go way over budget and possibly force Jeremy to divorce me.

This isn't my official post for the day. I'll do that later, but I just wanted to share what I found on Ali Edwards's blog--a link to Rhonna Farrer's Cafe Press store. IF you liked Ali's store, you're going to love this one. And, now that I thought I had found a great mousepad, I have found a ton more candidates to make my decision even harder. Too bad they're $15.00 each. I'd just buy a bunch and have one a month for an entire year! That would be excessive, don't you think? Maybe one a quarter. ;)

My other exciting find (and this one has made me starry eyed) is the Lazar Studiowerx online storethat offers everything you'd ever need to make your own Claudine Hellmuth Poppets. Wouldn't it be fun to take these on vacation to make postcards? The ideas are flying around in my head so quickly, I just might not be able to sleep tonight. The only problem is that I want all of the stamps, and the clothing lazer cuts and I've just about shot my wad for the month (besides it would take me two months to buy everything I want) for discretionary spending. Oh, how I hate trying to be disciplined.

PS Jeremy actually really liked the Claudine Hellmuth art, and is very supportive of getting me one for a late Mother's Day present. (Late because I want to wait until the littel guy arrives so he can be in it too.) Jill, want to collaberate with Claudine Hellmuth? We're definitely going to need some pictures!

Alright, this wasn't supposed to be long. I'm off to eat lunch in peace and rest until Kaitlin wakes up or until it's time to leave for my doctor's appointment. Whichever comes first.

I want a Claudine Hellmuth!

For those of you who read Donna Downey's blog, you may know what I'm talking about. She had a Claudine Hellmuth Poppets canvas created for herself a while ago. There's a darling picture of it on her blog--top left corner. When I first saw it I thought, "Hmm. Cute." And nothing more. Then, for some reason the image of her picture took hold in my mind, and now I really want one. Actually, I want two. I want one for my new revamped craft room, and one for Kaitlin's room. I was perusing her web site today and she had this one as an example. (Do you think it's ok to have this picture on my blog? I would hate to infringe on her copyright, or anything. I'll give her big credit.)
THIS ARTWORK WAS CREATED BY CLAUDINE HELLMUTH!
Would that not be the cutest in a little girl's room? I am absolutely in love with Claudine's work. It just has that touch of whimsy that I'm looking to add to my life right now. Of course, Jeremy will probably think they're weird. But do I really care? Not in this case! It looks like I'll be very careful with my money again next month, (and maybe the month after) so I can make my dream to own a Claudine Hellmuth, or two, a reality! Or maybe I'll use this month's money. Or maybe Jeremy will love the idea so much he'll pay for them! I could tell him it's an early mother's day present. I don't know. I have to seriously think about this.

Anyway, if you want to see more just follow this link to Claudine's website. She also has a blog that I haven't read yet, but if the obsession continues, I will probably have to add it to my daily rounds.

Mouse pads and other stuff

Everyone has posted beautiful pictures of their gardens and their neighborhoods all abloom. I thought I'd find a nice image of the desert in spring, since my neigborhood looks like a desert right now. And I have to say, I was heartily disappointed. Look how lush this scene is! My neighborhood looks nothing like this! Oh, I can't wait until people start landscaping their yards. As soon as we have a picture of our final landscape design I'll try to find a way to post it. The landscape designer that we hired came up with the most beautiful design for our front yard! So, have you figured out that Jeremy is not a DIY kind of guy, yet? We have to have somebody design our yard for us! Sheesh! The upside is that at least I don't have to do it either. Jeremy says that his time is too valuable to work around the house. You'd die if you knew the dollar amount he put on each hour he's awake.

Anyway, since I'm redoing my craft room/home office I've been looking for a mousepad. I don't currently have a mouse pad. I use a pad of graph paper. This is nice because I always have paper handy when I need it. But there's a part of me that still regrets not buying one of the cool mouse pads they had at the Art Institute in Chicago when we were there four years ago. Then, today I was catching up on my scrapbooker blogs. I clicked on the link to Ali Edwards's Cafe Press store and found this cool mousepad. My furniture is white with a black desktop so it would really stand out. And I think it would look really cool with my white Mac and white Mac mouse. Kinda modern, but very cool. Anyway, there's lots of fun stuff in her store. You should check it out--if only so you can get mad at yourself and wonder why you didn't think of it first!

One final note (AND THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT!!!!) to everyone who says they're going to try the Home Wrecker Brownie recipe. I didn't put in the recipe to grease and flower the pan. I buttered my pan, but the brownies are still a little hard to get out. So you might want to flour the pan, or if you're having a particularly Martha moment, you will want to use cocoa instead. That way you don't get any unsightly visible white flour on the outside of your brownies.

I'm just really feeling happy

In fact I would almost say I'm feeling euphoric. I haven't experienced this level of happiness and satisfaction with my life for quite some time. And I have all of you, my blogging friends to thank for it. One of the dominant themes of your blogs lately has been gratitude. It seems that so much is happening in my life to be grateful for. Of course, there are my house things which you have all had to endure for the last few posts, but my inner dialog today has been mainly a list of things that I am thankful for. Here's my gratitude list for today.

1. My husband. Jeremy knows me so well. He knows my needs and never fails to meet them. This weekend he's taking Kaitlin away over night. I live for this alone time. It's something that I've needed all of my life. I used to hole myself up in my room for countless hours as an adolescent just so I could be alone. I know this is common for most preteen and teenaged children, but I didn't do it out of moodiness. I jsut really like being alone. Jeremy knows this about me, and he lets me indulge as much as I need. This makes me love him even more. It also gives me the desire to let him indulge the things that make him him, like backpacking and other wilderness adventuring.
2. The coming new baby. Although I really wanted to get pregnant, I've really been kind of ambivilant about the actual arrival of our new baby. LIfe seems pretty good right now, and I'm really afraid of all that changing. This week I've had to go to the hospital for some lab work and a rhogam shot (becasue I have rh- blood that can be very dangerous for the baby). Yesterday I took Kaitlin with me for the lab work and we stopped by the nursery to see the new born babies. Kaitlin studied them very intently, pointed at one of them and declared, "I like it. I want it." That simple declaration made me feel so much better about things. I know Kaitlin is going to be fine. I'm going to be fine. I am so grateful for the opportunity that we had to go to the hospital together. I really needed that in order to put my fears to rest.
3. The ability to play outside. Do I really need to explain this further? K and I played outside with her cousins today. It was wonderful and surprisingly warm.
   
4. Visiting teaching companions with take charge personalities. I have such a strange timidity when it comes to making phone calls, so visiting teaching comes really hard for me. She called me today with appointments all set up. I love that!
5. Just my life in general. I realized that I have a great life. I have been so blessed. I really don't know why. I feel like I've done nothing to deserve the blessings that I have received. Jeremy and I went through some tough years at the begining of our marriage. We had no money. Jeremy was self employed and would literally bring home a fe whundred dollars a month. I was the bread winner, and in my salary there wasn't that much bread. Then we also had some serious marital issues (something that I'm not sure any of you know about) resulting in a short separation. Through hard work and dedication to each other we have managed to build a life together that brings tremendous happiness and satisfaction to us both. I love my life. Even with all of my little frustrations I wouldn't change a thing.
6. Homewrecker brownies. There is a story behind the name (I'll explain it if inayone's interested), but I cheifly want to share this amazing brownie recipe with you all. In all reality, I'm probably just on a brownie high from which I will crash and feel miserable in the morning. Good thing I still have half a pan!

Homewrecker Brownies
1/2 cup butter
1/4 cup cocoa
2 eggs
1 cup sugar
3/4 cup flour
1/2 chopped nuts (optional)
1/8 tsp salt

In small saucepan melt butter and cocoa, stirring as they melt. Remove from heat. In a medium bowl beat eggs until frothy. Add sugar, flour, nuts and salt. DON'T STIR YET!! Pour chocolate mixture over top and stir together until smooth. Bake in 8" pan at 350 degrees for 30 minutes or until a toothpick inserted in the middle comes out clean. Once brownies are cooled completely, frost with following recipe.

Icing
1 1/3 cup powdered sugar
1/3 cup cocoa
3 tbsp butter (softened)
1 tsp vanilla
5 tsp water

Beat all together and spread on cooled brownies.

I defy anyone to feel sad after eating these!

Have a great weekend everyone!

My house, but no longer woeful

Today is the day that I get to start loving my house again. When Jeremy and I decided to buy this house it was because we loved it. We loved the look of it, we loved the floorplan and we loved the potential it had to be even better than it already was. But then problems with some of the finish work, squeaky floors, and dissatisfaction with choices we made began to feed to a growing sense of disillusionment about homeownership. After months of wrangling back and forth with the builder, includng our hiring an attorney to put a little fear into Richmond American's post-construction department, today the repair work began. (A little aside to say that once we started to deal with the right people at Richmond American things got done a lot faster and they have really gone above and beyond the call of duty to make us happy by agreeing to fix certain things, like the tile, that they really weren't obligated to fix. Most of the problems with our house boil down to the following lesson: don't build a house in the winter. Too many things can go wrong!)

Anyway, last night Jeremy and I spent the evening moving any furniture on our tile floors off of them and into our dining room. Today the tile workers came in to re-grout the floors. Although they have yet to clean up the grout--it's still drying--I can already tell that I'm going to like my tile 100% more than I have in the past. I'm thrilled with the job. I can't wait until they're done so I can take off my shoes and socks and walk around without feeling the edge of the time cutting into the bottoms of my feet.

The middle of April is going to see some major changes in my house. First we are having the carpet ripped up to fix all of the squeaky floors. Yay! If this was all we were doing I'd be thrilled, but since we're going to have all of the carpet removed we thought we'd do a few other things. Next we're going to have all of the walls textured on our bottom floor, except for the master bedroom, as well as up the stairs into the upstairs landing. The drywall contractor liked the tall niche above our fireplace so much that he offered to do Ventian plaster in that area for free if we would agree to allow him to refer people to us and possibly let his prospective clients come to our house to see his work. Uh, yeah! We're also going to have our little half bath Venetian plastered. With all of the plastering going on we're also going to have to have the majority of our house repainted, which I'm excited about, since the paint color that I chose has been one of the primary misgivings about my design choices. I'm going to lighten the color slightly and have the ceiling painted the same color as all of the moulding. Then depending on the bid amount, I may have the painter also paint all of the upstairs bedrooms, the bonus/scrapbooking room and the master bedroom/bathroom painted. I know Jeremy doesn't want to do all of that painting, and while I would do it, I don't think I want to commit to that project while almost 7 months pregnant (when this all happens), or with a new baby in the hosue. The only downside to all of this is that I'm going to have to move out of my house for two weeks to get all of this done. It will be worth it, though when I get to move back in to a house that will feel, and probably smell, new!

Finally, my craftroom furniture came today. I'm postively itching to bring it upstairs and set it all up, but I must resist. It would be silly to set it all up only to have to take it down in three weeks. Besides the furniture will be easier to move while in boxes. Also, if I wait until the house is ready to move back into and I've really been good with my spending this month I'll have money to decorate my room as well. Can you tell I'm trying to convince myself that I want to wait here?

OK, now, this is the real "finally." I want to thank my friends who so generously offered to come help me move. You guys are so sweet, and know how to take such good care of a girl! I think this weekend I'm going to finish up all of my unfinished projects, and begin purging/packing. I want to reduce the amount of stuff in here significantly to eliminate clutter. I'll still call if I need help, but I think I should be able to handle this one. You guys are the greatest!

Just some random stuff

I can't seem to get my mind to focus on any one topic for too long these days, so here's a short list of things I've had going on .

1. I've been going the rounds in my head about returning letters that people have written to me to the people who wrote them. Most of these people would be men who wrote to me during their missions. I've read through several of these letters over the last little while and think it would be fun for the writers to be able to read them too. Jeremy thinks this idea sounds weird and that I should just throw them away. Somehow I can't bring myself to do that. What do you think? Do you think the wives of these men would be uncomfortable?
2. I was doing my dishes today and I noticed that I have a lot more plates and forks in my dishwasher than spoons and bowls. I always feel tremendously gratified by this. It means to me that I'm doing my job to feed my family and that we're not just living on cold cereal and spaghetti with sauce out of a jar, or even worse, restaurant food. Tonight I made grilled flank steak, mashed potatoes, peas and a salad for dinner. When I run the dishwasher tonight it won't be because I'm out of spoons and bowls for breakfast in the morning.
3. This month I'm trying a little experiment. As many of you know on the 20th of the month Jeremy gives me all of the money I will need to run the house until the 20th of the next month. I have my own checking account that all household expenses come out of. In all honesty, this allows me to be irresponsible with my money but in a limited way. Well, I'm am totally irresponsible, and I overspend every month because I know I have the Jeremy safety net to bail me out. This month I've decided to try to rein myself in. Last month I overspent by around $300. I don't know how I did this. I could figure it out, because for once I kept my receipts, but there are so many of them. Instead of going to Jeremy I've put myself on a strict cash only budget that's half of my normal budget. There are two reasons for this. First I want to pay off my credit card when the balance comes due. Second, I'm really itching to buy stuff for my house, but since those expenditures are supposedly built into my existing monthy budget and I have nothing to show for it, Jeremy is not about to give me any more money. Especially with the home improvement projects we have coming up.
4. I'm still going strong on my to do lists. I'm feeling very tempted by the Real Simple lists they have at Target right now (well really all of the Real Simple stuff they have there. See #3 about why I'm not buying!) because they're so pleasing. For now my spiral bound notebook will do. Luckily it's cute. The lines on the pages are pink. My goal for the week is to finish it by Friday. Jeremy and Kaitlin are going camping in Arches on Friday night so I'll have the evening and most of Saturday to play.
5. I finished The Known World today. I just love literature about the South, written by Southerners. I'm going to write a blog about it that I'll publish after book club because I have a lot of ideas that I'd like to get down. I think we could have a good book club discussion about it. Can't wait!

That's all for now. Thanks for staying with me. Kaitlin's ready for her bedtime stories, and since I'm the only one who can read to her, I must obey! Then it's off to prepare the house for the tile guys. They're coming to fix all of my time woes. Yay!

New Furniture!

OK this is not my workspace, but tonight I made the first step towards making it what I want it to be. So a while ago I posted about the furniture I wanted to order for my dream scrapbook room. Well, a week or two ago we got a surprise in the mail. We'd been overcharged by a lot by our mortgage company for our county tax escrow so they sent us a reimbursement check for the overage. I half jokingly said that we should spend the money on my furniture. Jeremy, to my great surprise, very readily agreed. One of the items on my To Do list for the week was to get the furniture ordered. Tonight was the big night. I think I'm going to leave most of the details as a surprise but I will say that the Ballard Designs furniture ended up not working in my space so I ordered from Pottery Barn instead. I'm a little bummed because the furniture should be here this week, but I can't set it up until we get the floors fixed in our house. So it will sit in boxes in my garage probably until the middle to end of April. But then I might just have to have a craftroom warming party to break it in. I'm excited, however, because I've wanted furniture specifically for my room for ever. I've just been too cheap to indulge. Now, I can look forward to finishing my room and really making it mine. I'll start by packing up, moving out and painting. Hopefully this will compensate for the amount of time I have to wait to actually use the furniture. Then as soon as the floors are fixed everything is going right back in. In fact, it will be the second room I set up. Kaitlin's room will have to be first. But then, who knows, maybe her new furniture will be here by then, too, so I'll have two fun decorating projects on my plate! OK, I'm going to finish, I'm too giddy with the thought of new stuff for my house (nesting, anyone?) and I don't want to become too disgusting in the process.

PS Is anyone else having problems with Blogger right now? I've used both Safari and Firefox to post. Tonight I can't get on with Safari at all, and Firefox is not allowing me to upload pictures? What's going on??!!! Michelle, I feel your pain.

Who wouldn't love this face?

Yesterday was a good day. Not only did I get to have my friends over last night to celebrate Michelle's birthday, but I also got photos from Jill of the photo shoot she did of Kaitlin this week. I am always worried before I have Jill come over to take pictures of Kaitlin. She's not a child who takes direction very well--but she's only two, so what can I really expect? This is why I haven't had Jill come nearly as often as I would have liked, and I vow to be better with my next one. Anyway, Jill always does two things for me. First, she puts me at ease. She doesn't get stressed when Kaitlin's acting like a two year old, like I do. She's patient and calm, and this has an amazing calming effect on me. Second, and most important, she uses her genius to take some really great pictues of my girl. I love having Jill come over to our house to take pictures because it enables her to capture the true esssence of Kaitlin in her native environment. She captures her silly side, the things she loves playing with, and this time her and I reading her favorite book. She records all of the things that I love most about Kaitlin in the most beautiful way. To me this is much more valuable than getting her to sit still and take one good photo in a cheesy portrait studio. So thank you Jill. Again you have amazed me and given me something much better than I ever thought Kaitlin was capable of. You are a true talent!

House Woes, and etc.

Why is it that I always fall of the face of the blogging world during the weekend? And why does it take me until Tuesday to find my way back? I miss you all on these little weekend breaks. But, I have been good and I went and commented on everyone's blogs, so at least I'm current with you. I'm having a hard time getting too motivated today. I had a good morning, but Jeremy informed me that I'm facing the prospect of packing up my house all weekend. If you've been to my house you've either noticed or I've pointed out the squeaky floor problem that we have. Our house is less than a year old and it sounds worse than houses that are a hundred years older. So we've finally gotten our builder to agree to come fix the floors (you wouldn't believe their hesitation!). The problem is that we have to clear everything out so they can roll back the carpet, screw down the subflooring and then relay the carpet again. For two reasons this is a good thing. First the prospect of unpacking is exciting. Of course the room in which I have the most stuff to pack is my scrapbooking room. The reorganization possibilities are thrilling! And I'll have my new furniture on order so it will make it just that much easier to put things away when it comes. Also, since the room is going to be empty I'm going to take the opportunity to paint it. The second exciting thing is that I'm going to be able to do spring cleaning type vacuuming without any extra effort to move furniture around. But I'm not sure that the pain of having to move everything on someone else's time scale overrides even those happy thoughts. I'll let you know next Wednesday.

I did get a good three hour nap out of Kaitlin today. (She does love me!) So I continued with my CD organization and storage project. I've got them all cataloged, and half of them are ready to go into boxed for long term storage. In the process of all this I've found a lot more music that I needed to rip into iTunes for my iPod. This is a very time consuming job, but it's been fun. I've rediscovered all of my Broadway musical sountracks that I got in high school. How is it that I still know all the words? Right now I'm listening to the soundtrack from Miss Saigon. It's so good! So sad.

OK, so who's watching 24? If you are, and you're not caught up on the episodes you'd better stop reading now. I may write something you don't want to read! Have you heard of willful suspension of disbelief? Every season I'm amazed at how much they expect us to believe. I had high hopes for this season. Everyone seemed to be acting in a pretty realistic manner. But then President Logan decided to give the Russian President's auto route to the airport to a group of terrorists, and it all started going downhill for me. Since then, there has been event after event of such nonsensical proportions that I seriously consider giving up the show altogether after just about every episode. Of course I won't. I have to see what's going to happen next, and, here's the kicker, they always manage to pull it together in the end. That's the genius of 24. The last 2-3 hours are intense and exciting enough so that people forget how ridiculous the rest of the season was. Well Kiefer helps a little in that area, too. So today my TV cheer is "Go American Idol!" At least Simon is predictable in the least ridiculous way possible.

And that's all I have to say today.

Dora, Dora, Dora the exporer!

Kaitlin has discovered Dora and her animal saving cousing Diego. I swore that I would never let her watch Dora or Diego. I find them so annoying! But then my sister had a Dora movie playing in her car for a while so it was unavoidable since we always ride with her. She is now a Dora and Diego fanatic. She asks for them all the time. All she wants to watch in the morning is Dora and Diego. They have replaced Finging Nemo, Jo Jo's Circus, The Wiggles, Charlie and Lola, etc, etc. Today I had an appointment with the doctor (I have pinkeye!) which led to having to get a prescription filled at Target. I had about 15 minutes to kill, so I went back to the toy section to look for a birthday present for my niece. I didn't find anything for her, but I found tons of fun Dora stuff for K. I bought her two puzzles, Memory and Candyland. They're all way too old for her, but I figured what the heck. She is a puzzle genius (if I do say so myself), so she'll probably catch on to the puzzles eventually. We've played Memory before, so she'll get into that one as well, eventually. But the Candyand is what I'm most excited about. She doesn't get it at all but the game pieces are so cool. She's been carrying them around with her all day--so score one for Mommy!

From Despair to Dignity

A little lightness before I get into what my title means. . .OK, so I've been reading the help information for Blogger, trying to fiure out a thing or two, and I was surprised to find that the interface for all of you Firefox users is different from my interface, simply because I'm a Safari user. How does it even know? Isn't the Internet Amazing. For example, there are tabs at the top of the text box, one that says "Edit HTML" and one that says "Compose." Then, and this is the most exciting, there are buttons to change the font color, the font, to make type bold or italicized, to create lists. . .the possibilities seem endless. And here I was wondering how you girls all figured out how to change fonts and colors, etc, and it was proving so elusive to me. And I thought you all were just soooooo techno-savvy! You really had me fooled!

On a more serious note, I said that when I figured out how to post links in my text I would start to write about the things that I seriously feel passionate about (not just ribbon--though there's nothing wrong with feeling passionate about ribbon!). Here's the first one.

I think I was pregnant with Kaitlin when I first heard about this place on Oprah. I'm a little embarrassed to talk about Oprah, since my thoughts on her have changed drastically since then (that's another post), but she does impart some really good information. Anyway, I can't remember the show's topic, it might have been about living conditions of women around the world, or something like that, but she had a guest that I will never forget. Her name is Catherine Hamlin. She is cofounder of a hospital for women in Ethiopia who suffer from obstatric fistula, damage that occurs during childbirth. Without getting too graphic, they are unable to control the release of bodily waste, because a hole has formed that allows contsant leakage.

I was struck by this story for several reasons. First, I am always moved by stories of how women are treated around the world. We are so blessed to live in a Western Culture that gives us freedoms unheard of to women in other countries, as well as the respect of society as a whole. When I hear stories of women in other cultures who suffer countless indignities, such as the women Dr. Hamlin works with in Ethiopia, I am truly saddened. It is devastating for me to see humans cast out simply because they happen to be born women. Even worse is when they are outcast because because of circumstances over which they have no control. Second, I really liked Dr. Hamlin. She was so full of compasssion for these women who suffer needlessly. Usually women who suffer from an obstetric fistula are cast out of their homes, their families and their villages because the stink they carry with them is so great. They are usually young girls who have borne children while they are still children themselves because of their tribal traditions. If I was in a similar situation I know I would feel hopeless and valueless. I remember her saying that when a woman is realesed from the Fistula Hospital they are given a bus ticket back to their village and a new dress. This way they can arrive in triumph and beauty. Part of the stated mission of the hospital is "to provide services for those suffering from childbirth and related injuries, and rehabilitate them to the point where they can be integrated back into their society with dignity and a sense of self-worth." What an amazing thing to be able to give somebody back their sense of self-worth. Finally, I was struck by how cheaply the surgery and rehabilitation can be done. I seem to recall that Dr. Hamlin told Oprah that the surgery, 3 weeks of rehabilitation, a new dress and a bus ticket cost about $425. Can you imagine--something that life-changing coming for a mere (and I know this is all relative) $425?

I have had this on my mind now for over two years. Occasionally I think about that show, and the hospital. I wonder what I could do to make a difference in other people's lives. I have no special training, I'm not a doctor, or a scientist. I have virtually no experience outside of the United States. I know there are opportunities out there to touch people's lives. Do you know of any?

If you want to learn more about Dr. Hamlin and her experiences, she wrote a book entitled The Hospital by the River. You can read more about it at Powells Books. Apparently, if you buy the book through Powells they will donate 7.5% of the purchase price of $13.99 to the hospital. Just a little contribution to a very worthy cause.

I'm so tired tonight.

I haven't posted in a few days, so I just wanted to say hi. We had some people from Richmond American over while Kaitlin was napping. I spent my morning cooking, finishing the laundry, and straightening the house so it wouldn't be a disaster for the Richmond guys (like they care!). How can one little girl make such a big mess in such a short time? I can hardly think. I'm off to watch Monday's 24 with Jeremy, then American Idol and then I think I'll turn in for the night. I don't remember being this sleepy for a long time. Until tomorrow, when, hopefully, I'll be a thinking person again.

Progress Report

I'm proud to announce that my To-Do List is almost all checked off. I have one more day to complete it since it was my list of things to do while Jeremy was at the Grand Canyon, and he's not coming back until tomorrow night. Here's what I have left to do:

1. Call Michael to ask about digital camera and ask for pictures
vacuum car and wash inside of windows
2. Type recipes--this one will not be finished. I didn't have Jeremy's laptop, and sitting up to my computer is killing my back!
3. Finish Book Club "Christmas" presents--I accomplished a major portion of this project, but, alas, they will not be done by tomorrow. They will be done by the time we have Michelle's birthday party.
4. Get enlargements made of Kaitlin's portraits for Pottery Barn frames
5. Write letters to Nikki, Nicki, and Erin. I've written to Erin. The Nickis are next.

Not bad! Tonight I'm planning on locking myself in my craft room, working on the Book Club project and writing my letters.

By the way, here's my To Do List for this week

1. Get Designing With calendar bound
2. Wrap ribbon on chipboard and file in box
3. Schedule photo shoot with Jill for K's 2nd birthday.
4. Buy stamps
5. Mail payment for newspaper
6. Plan menu and shop for ingredients
7. Cook and freeze meals
8. Call Utah Power to see if they will come pick up Jenna's fridge
9. Return library books by Tuesday
10. Begin working on diaper bag
11. Sort through all piles of paper--file, toss or put away everything!
12. Hang up K's portraits on stair wall
13. Make returns to Target--pink dishes, K's shoes
14. Laundry
--Light wash
--Dark wash
--K's clothes
--towels
15. Take necklace to be shortened, and wedding ring to be fixed to Kay Jewelers
16. Buy shoes for Kaitlin (sandals, Easter/church, tennis shoes)
17. Return picture to Emily with some kind of treat.
18. Call Alicia to confirm dinner for Sunday and to ask what she would like me to bring.
19. Kaitlin's health permitting (yes, she has another cold!) start back up at the gym.

Let me tell you--I love the list! It feels great to get so much done. I'm just worried that I'm going to run out of things to do in another week or so. Then what? Anyone need any help?

Sometimes I Just Stare in Disbelief

Did I really have a hand in creating THIS! But then I step back and I am forced to look at the situation. She's licking chocolate frosting off of a beater. Kaitlin's newest food obsession is cake. Ever since I cut a small piece from a Hostess Cupcake, it's all she asks for. And I realize, yes, she's mine. It's undeniable. Because there is almost nothing I would rather eat than a nice piece of cake thickly frosted in homemade chocolate heavily almond tasting butter cream frosting.

Just a little blogging practice.

You might have noticed that my sidebar looks a little more full. I finally figured out how to post links, so look for more in the future. This is just my preliminary offering. Now I'm trying to see if I can add a link into the text of a blog entry. So, here it goes. One of my links is to Ballard Designs. If you're not on their mailing list (and I don't know how I ended up on it) you need to go to their website and request a catalog. They have the coolest desk system that I think would work perfectly for my scrapbooking paradise. It's the Office Designs Corner Desk Group with an additional Office Designs Desk. What I like about these pieces is that they are totally configurable to my needs. I want several file drawers to get all of our household papers out of the basement. The CPU cabinet would be great for tall items such as 12x12 paper storage, alphabet stickers, etc. The possibilities are endless. Jeremy and I are in talks right now to see when I can get this system. I think it will be for my birthday/Mother's Day/Anniversary/Flag Day/Memorial Day/Baby Delivery presents. Basically I've told him that if I get this system he's off the hook for the rest of the year. Now what man wouldn't go for that?

Just wait until he sees what I want to replace the wire cubes I have on the wall opposite of my desk system. The other day I found these in the newest Pottery Barn catalog. It's the Landon Modular Bath Collection. Yes, it is technically bathroom furniture, but just look at it! If the possibilities with the Ballard Design Furniture are endless, the possibilities with this storage system are limitless, infinite and never ending, all at the same time! Oh the things I could do. The child-proofing alone is enough to get my heart racing!

OK, so let's see if my little experiment worked. If these links all work I'll be amazed. If not, have patience. I have to stop blogging now so I can get my house ready to be cleaned tomorrow. It's a disaster. I had my nephews over all morning, then K and I went out as soon as naptime, well today we'll call it quiet time, since I don't think Kaitlin even rested her head on her pillow, was over. Until later--and thanks for your patience!

The Widow of the South

I picked this book up at Costco when it was first published. I don't know why exactly. I was probably just giving in to the urge that I continually fight to buy a new book. There are others on my shelves of books to read that I felt more drawn to when I picked this one up, but I still picked it up and forged ahead. It took me half a month to read, so it wasn't a page turner in the classic sense of that description, but at the same time, I savored every word as I read it. The Widow of the South is the nickname given to Carrie McGavock (an actual person), a woman whose home was taken over by the Confederate Army to serve as a hospital for the wounded in the Battle of Franklin, Tennessee. At the beginning of the story she is a woman broken by the tragic loss of her young children. She has used her grief to retreat from the world, form her remaining family, and from her obligations as mistress of a large plantation. In her eyes, God has forsaken her. She is alone and she wishes, more than anything to die. Then the Civil War (or the War of the Southern Rebellion--as my high school American History teacher called it) comes to her front door. Suddenly she is charged with a task that is insurmountable. During the battle, more than 9200 soldiers are killed. Many more are wounded. Hundreds of soldiers come to her house to be either nursed back to health, or to be ushered into death. She meets Zachariah Cashwell, a wounded soldier, and for some reason feels herself drawn to him. He believes, like herself, that all he wants is to die. Inexplicably, Carrie refuses to allow him to, and instead saves his life by insisting that he have his leg amputated. As her recovers in her home, she comes to know him. She realizes that neither of them truly wants to die--that living is the most important thing.

A quote almost near the end of the book explains the magnitude of Carrie's experiences. "I am alone on this earth. How often had I that that very same thing, rocking in my room above the entryway, imagining that I had been abandoned by my own children? On my knees in angry prayer I had said those words as both a statement of fact and an accusation. But I knew now I was not alone on this earth. It hadn't come to me in a rush, there were no angels involved. I had just kept living, and living had shown me that there were other things in the world, like a one legged sergeant who listened to me like I was the most exotic thing in the world, like a boy who could die on the floor of my house thinking only of how to get word to his mother, like a husband who would do anything for me even if it meant angering the man who held his debts, and so many other things that I had observed just by sitting and living and keeping my eyes open (374)."

This seems to be a theme in my life lately--something I've thought about a lot. It definitely fits in with the idea that the sum of the bad will never equal the sum of the good. Carrie was so overcome with the bad in her life that she was unable to recognize that there was any good. For her the death of her children wiped away any good that she had had. It was the terrible tragedy of the war and the resulting project of giving the fallen soldiers a peaceful cemetery in which to lay, that helped her to wake up and see the actual richness of her life. It seems that this is one of the failings of our culture. We are taught to think that we must have more, that what we have isn't good enough, that we don't see the people around us who love and appreciate us. We fail to recognize ways that we can bless each other's lives. Life and all of it's gifts is abundant. I'm grateful that I've read and talked about this lately so I can remember to open my eyes and see.

And now I have to end-- a little earlier than I would have liked, because to answer the question I pose every day in my URL, no, she is not going to take a nap and now she's starting to cry!

Next up (and this will be an exciting one for you all, I just know it) Founding Brothers: The Revolutionary Generation by Joseph J. Ellis.

Total pages read by end of February: 3163.

It's the simple things

I've been noticing lately that the simple things in life are the things that make me happiest. We were talking at Book Club the other night about how the sum of all the bad things that happen don't come close to equaling the good--even though the bad things seem to weigh so much more. The good things are those small things that happen every day that we hardly notice. Or maybe they are the things we notice but forget almost instantly. Jill's art challenge a few weeks ago got me thinking--about goals, yes, but also that lately I hardly devote any time to creative endeavors. I've felt the lack of it in my life. I used to love the feeling of designing, creating and then finishing a scrapbook layout or a project. How did I get to the point that even the ideas of starting was burdensome? I decided to do something about it. I sat down and scrapbooked. Here's the thing, I felt very accomplished for having made an idea into something tangible. But something else happened--I felt like I got a little piece of myself back. I was no longer just Kaitlin's Mom and Jeremy's wife. I was me, doing something for myself, that only I could do. It was exhilarating. The other good thing about it, was that I accomplished this through scrapbooking about the simple joy I get from the name by which Kaitlin refers to herself, which is KK. It's like I went on a mini journey, came full circle and found out a little something about myself. All without leaving my craft room. To commemorate my little self discovery, I decided to display my work on this cute little easel I bought at IKEA years ago. A daily reminder of how I want my life to be. Now, that makes me happy.

Thanks to Jill

I have been trying to get Jeremy to help me add a profile picture to my blog, as well as teach me how to add links. Last night at book club Jill helped me add a profile picture, and we think we figured out a way for me to do links. I'll play with it a little more when Kaitlin's sleeping. Thanks Jill--and thanks for finding a good picture of me. I would have cheated and put a picture from college when I was young and skinny!